Embrace your inner superhero


I regularly teach clients, yoga students and workshop participants about Amy Cuddy’s fantabulous research into how changing our posture can change our lives.

You can see her Ted Talk here.

And her delightful book, Presence gives many more examples.

In a nutshell, when we expand our posture and hold it for 2 minutes or longer, we increase our testosterone (confidence! competence! courage!) while reducing our cortisol levels (so we feel less stressed and more empowered.

We might make like Wonder Woman or Superman, creating a star fish shape, making the kind of victory sign with our bodies athletes make when they win (arms outstretched, chest out) or taking a yoga pose like Warrior II (click here for more information). Anything expansive.

Essentially, by taking such a pose, we’re sending signals of confidence to our own brains (which get us out of that hunched posture that indicates we’re under threat and then relays the information that it’s safe to relax and be present to the rest of our body) as well as letting others know that we’re confident and capable.

We’re not going to be risk taking but we can bring our, as Amy Cuddy says, ‘boldest selves to our greatest challenges’.

I’ve heard of people power posing in car parks next to their cars before going in to make a presentation.

Shonda Rhimes is such a fan, she wrote it into an episode of Grey’s Anatomy where Amelia was about to perform an especially arduous 25 hour brain op on a colleague.

Sometimes, just taking a power pose can make us grin and remember we’ve got this (be it a first date, job interview, exam or even getting dressed on a particularly challenging day).

It’s not about dominating anyone, just getting our own bodies into a state in which we remember our own resourcefulness.

Other times, unfolding ourselves to take up more space in our lives might feel quite challenging. We can build up.

Try it. Choose one at a time and time yourself for 2 minutes or longer. See how it makes you feel.

Which is your favourite?

What did you notice about how you felt afterwards?

Feel free to comment below.





On BBC Essex today – sharing confidence tips for women (and men!) who apologise ‘too much’


It was a pleasure, as ever, joining Sadie Nine on BBC Essex this morning. Apparently, there’s an app now, that shows an alert if your email is too apologetic. I know I used to apologise so much, Sorry was practically my middle name. Switching automatic ‘sorry’s for ‘thank you’s helped (our brains need to replace the habits we want to quit with something better) helped and I also learned to be kinder to myself instead of beating myself up, compounding my overly apologetic, ‘Please don’t throw me off the planet for one false step’ nature.

Becoming more embodied (more – progress not perfection) has helped and I love sharing some of the tools that are so useful (such as the Power Poses Amy Cuddy’s Harvard research popularised).

You can listen here

Would an app like the one mentioned help you?

Do you think you apologise too much?

Do you find it really hard to apologise, even when you wish you could?

What helps you?

Feel free to comment below.


Eve x







On ITV News (Anglia) talking about career paths and confidence

On ITV News (Anglia), 9/4/15
On ITV News (Anglia), 9/4/15

A few weeks back, I was asked to support a young woman, Leigh-Ann, by offering life coaching comment on a project she’s doing for the youth charity Fixers. I was asked to facilitate a simple vision boarding exercise for some older students at Basildon Upper Academy in order to help them access their inner wisdom when it came to the choices they’re facing.

Although when I usually do this kind of exercise with clients and workshop participants it’s more relaxed and easier to lose yourself in the process (very different being filmed and directed by producers), the students said that they’d benefited.

By supporting them in just allowing themselves to be drawn to particular words and images and creating a vision board, my hope is that they’ll add to them at home (where they’re not being filmed so have more time) and that they’re able to use what they’ve already created to boost their confidence in being true to themselves.

Sometimes results are very obvious and can keep us focused and motivated when working towards specific goals we’ve pictured on our boards. Other times, seeing it reminds us of a sense we felt while working on it and we can use that as guidance, too.

You can view Leigh-Ann’s film by clicking here and see some of my comment (plus extreme overuse of the word ‘wonderful’).

And (whatever your age), if you want to get out of your head and more in tune with your heart, you may want to take an hour or so to create your own vision board:

1) gather a wide variety of magazines, scissors, glue and some paper / card to use as a base. A3 size is ideal but you can make it any size

2) allow yourself to be drawn to whatever images, colours, words etc that appeal. There’s no need to analyse or judge, just cut them out and, when you feel ready, start sticking them to the board you’re creating

3) have FUN with it. Play with the colours and pictures and words. You might even want to embellish it with paints and glitters – make a mess and enjoy the process

4) when you feel like it’s ‘done’ hang it up somewhere you’ll see it several times a day. It can serve as a visual anchor to remind you of the kind of things you’re wanting to bring into your life (this may be literal or more abstract in terms of a feeling you got in touch with while creating it).

5) sometimes, that’ll be it. Other times, you’ll notice additional images and words when flicking through magazines and newspapers – cut them out and add them! Let your vision for yourself evolve

6) you might also want to play with digital vision board tools such as Pinterest to create ongoing inspiration for yourself


Eve x


Beards, tailgates and more on BBC Essex with Sadie Nine today

Shemar Moore
Shemar Moore

Had fun, as always, joining Sadie Nine at BBC Essex today (with fellow panellist, Gill Oliver).

You can listen to our discussion (from 1-2pm) on everything from men and beards to traffic laws getting tougher on tailgaters and other dangerous drivers by clicking here (for the next 7 days).

And to continue my defence of beards, here are some favourites:


Paul Rudd’s (above) has it’s own facebook page!

Denzel Washington - Photo by Paul Morigi/WireImage
Denzel Washington – Photo by Paul Morigi/WireImage
Aidan Quinn
Aidan Quinn

And I’ll end (this is reminding me of knowing I had to get out of the sea the other day and telling myself, just another little swim. Just another quick facial hair pic…) with Nick Offerman as Parks and Recreation’s fantabulous Ron Swanson:


Obviously, they all look pretty fab without beards, too. The whole Paxman beard thing just shows how ridiculous it is anytime anyone focuses on someone’s appearance (and, of course, when it’s done to a man, it highlights how obnoxious it is that not a day goes by when several women aren’t similarly targeted for some inanity to do with their body – too fat/too thin/cellulite/spots/grey/whatever) – we’re all human.

It’s great to be able to experiment with different looks and, for men, growing beards is one way to do that. Whatever we decide, we can choose to wear it with confidence and joy (no matter what anyone else says).

Metta xx