Tag Archives: 365 Ways to Feel Better

Thanks again, Chelmsford Waterstones!

Eve Waterstones Chelmsford

I had a lovely Saturday afternoon at the Chelmsford branch of Waterstones, attempting to look ‘friendly but not creepy’ as people paused to look at my book and I signed copies for those who wanted to buy one.

Looking forward to the next, at Billericay Library (click HERE) on 25th and am also now offering personalised signed copies for people who can’t get to various signings and events but want their own copy or a gift for someone else (click HERE).

love,

Eve

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I know, I know, but, in case you’ve started your Christmas shopping…

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I can already hear the outrage. It’s only the start of November! And yet, some people LIKE to sort Christmas and other holiday shopping early. Some people (including me) are already REALLY looking forward to making 2018 the best yet.

If you’re interested, I’ve put together a few potential gift ideas – maybe treats for yourself, maybe a gift for a loved one.

My book, Sleep Yoga classes, 9 Week Chakra Coaching Programme and any integrative therapy session (ie, you can choose which you’d like to include – some coaching alongside yoga? Crystals? NLP? EFT? Meditation? Recently, I’ve been working with yoga and crystals at the same time – really interesting, powerful work) are a few potential gift ideas.

Click HERE for more information and ideas and get in touch if you have any questions.

I work with individuals and groups in Essex (Witham, Colchester and Frinton on Sea) and worldwide via Skype/Vsee and telephone.

I look forward to working with you (and your loved ones!) the rest of this year, in 2018 and beyond.

love,

Eve

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Billericay Library book signing on Saturday, 25th November

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Am really pleased to be doing a book signing in the town I did a lot of growing up in. If you’re local enough to Billericay, Essex and would like to join us, please come along.

And if you have any friends, relatives, colleagues etc there who might be interested, I’d really appreciate your letting them know about this.

Hope to see you there!

And you can find out more about this and other upcoming events HERE.

love,

Eve

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What comes after #metoo?

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Alyssa Milano’s suggestion that all women who wanted to show how widespread sexual harassment, sexual assault and abuse are use the #metoo hashtag has gone viral with variations being taken up in other languages.

Some find it empowering, some infuriating. Some simply have used the hashtag (personally, I didn’t go over my stories – I didn’t take all of them to therapy but I did enough work on it to know that, for me, it wouldn’t have been helpful to dredge things up to an even greater extent again this week) while others have pulled no punches in detailing the examples.

Some have seen their perpetrators charged, tried and jailed.

Some have never told a soul until now.

And some men (notably, the wonderful Terry Crews from Brooklyn Nine-Nine) have spoken up about times it’s happened to them. And the fact that it happened to HIM, in front of his WIFE, shows that even with people who stop thinking of women as sex objects and instead like The Rock (click HERE for the brilliant, Rock endorsed advice), size, strength and power doesn’t ensure safety.

When the sky turned an eerie yellow and the sun red on Monday afternoon, I imagined, for a few seconds, that it was the result of so many women’s rage. That our combined anger and rising to say ENOUGH had literally shaken up the world, changing the colour of the sky.

Reading story after story emerge, my emotions rollercoaster in a way they’ve been rollercoastering since 45* announced his candidacy for the Presidency. Sometimes, I feel jaded like nothing can surprise me. Other times, the outrage rises again. Sometimes, this feels empowering. Other times, I feel exhausted by it all.

On the Tube today, seeing  a strange (to me) man glancing at the new report I was reading in the paper, I wanted to ASK him, What do YOU think about all of this? What will YOU do differently, as a man, to help ensure more women and girls are safe if you witness dodgyness? Obviously, I didn’t. I realised also that while I was raging (again) reading it, my face was in normal Tube Face mode and no one would have known about the turbulence I was feeling.

I don’t imagine I’m the only one. So I thought I’d share some thoughts in hopes some of them may help you:

  1. If you’re a man, please pause and bracket your feelings about how the revelations make you feel and ask the women in your life what, if anything, THEY want you to do to support them. The whole ‘What women want’ thing is as ludicrous as trying to define ‘What men want’ as if we were one homogenous group of people who all think and feel the same. Just like you, we’re whole people. My favourite definition of feminism, from Gloria Steinem, is simply this, thinking of women as whole people TOO
  2. If you chose not to #metoo, honour your decision to do what’s right for you. ALWAYS do what feels best for you
  3. If you shared your stories, BE SUPER GENTLE WITH YOURSELF. It’s a brave thing to do. Brene Brown’s work around shame and vulnerability teaches us that when we share our vulnerabilities with people who can hold and support us, we can avoid shame spiralling. The internet is a phenomenal tool for putting us in touch with support we could never have known about before. It can also be used to hurt people. Block people as necessary. Turn off comments if need be. Honour what is right for you
  4. Let your loved ones know what support you need. This isn’t the end of it. More and more high profile cases are coming to light and hard as it can feel to stomach the brutality and injustice, there’s a power in truth coming to light. Again, quoting the glorious Gloria Steinem, ‘The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off’
  5. Keep reminding yourself that you are safe now. You survived. You are so much more that what has been done to you.
  6. Notice what you feel in your body. Pay attention to how you want to move your body, maybe miming fighting back or lashing out many years or even decades later (it may sound silly but so much trauma gets trapped in our bodies, it’s amazing the difference listening, tracking and moving can make – read Peter Levine’s Waking the Tiger and Babette Rothchild for more if you’re interested). You may want to mime punching or kicking or screaming or any of the things you were unable to do as you did whatever you needed to do in the actual moment/s
  7. You may simply want to stamp your feet and scream and shout – let it out of your body. If this feels like too much, a walk or, better yet, a good run or energetic swim or push ups or any thing physical which honours the body’s natural fight/flight instinct.
  8. You may want to take up kick boxing or something similar. Lifting weights, becoming more powerful physically can be healing. Maybe dancing it out is more your style. Go to a class or even draw the curtains and go wild in your living room
  9. Drag out your mini trampoline if you have one and JUMP it out. Stamping feet can feel scary or too silly for some but with a rebounder, you can get similar effects
  10. Write a letter to the perpetrators you couldn’t protect yourself from. This is not to send but to get it all out. Burn it and maybe decide if there IS anything you want to say or do in reality (pressing charges etc). Again, whatever you decide, YOU KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU.
  11. Journal the full spectrum of emotion as and when it feels helpful (if that feels too permanent, use looseleaf paper and burn it safely afterwards or even loo roll and flush it)
  12. Think about a time or imagine a time you felt happy, contented and at ease. Really comfortable in your own skin. It might be a moment from a holiday, from years ago or it might be something completely imaginary – when I was first asked to do this many years ago, I cried because I couldn’t imagine feeling so happily embodied and at ease in my own skin. I started out by imagining myself floating in the sea, far away from people. While I still adore the sea (in real life, too), I’ve built up a comprehensive mental library of happy places to imagine – time giving your brain a break from the horrors of the news / intrusive thoughts not only feels nice but has an impact on our physiology, reducing stress and boosting performance
  13. Woman or man, get whatever support you need and deserve – no one is broken beyond repair. Find a good therapist and/or support group. We can use the rage to heal and make the world a safer place for everyone.

What helps you? Feel free to comment below.

love,

Eve

* Self-confessed sexual predator and white supremacist President of the US – since Lawrence Fishburne calmly called him 45 on The Daily Show many months ago, I’ve found that this simple number helps take some of the heat out of the pain and disbelief I’ve felt since enough people disregarded his recorded boasts of sexual assault and voted for him anyway

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My Frinton Literary Festival workshops

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It was SUCH a pleasure to facilitate a couple of workshops in one of my favourite places, Frinton on Sea, yesterday.

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I was offering a couple of the Community Events and was able to do two very different workshops at the library as different groups showed up in the morning and afternoon.

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The morning workshop was more cognitive with a goal setting exercise that participants can apply to other areas of their lives. We did some mind/body connection work to aid confidence, too.

I had a lovely lunch break paddling, reading and enjoying the sea.

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Then the afternoon group did some Chair Yoga and a cleansing meditation.

Both groups did a simple breath practice and chose little crystals to ground the workshops.

Gorgeous start to the week!

love,

Eve

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Highlights from my Colchester book launch at the delightful Tree Room

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I adore this space. Right in the heart of Colchester town yet peaceful and quiet. When I got in touch with the owner about the possibility of having a Colchester book signing  / workshop event, I liked the space so much I decided to expand my practice from Witham (where my Feel Better Every Day Consultancy is based) to offer a few slots each week in Colchester.

On Saturday, I facilitated a yoga and meditation workshop in the loveliest space I’ve ever taught in.

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We had a little visitor before the yoga nidra segment.

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Enormous thanks, Jo, for welcoming me to your spectacular space.

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love,

Eve

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Last weekend’s library workshop in Witham

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Thanks again to everyone who came to my first library event for 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing and to Witham Library for hosting.

I wanted to share a taste of the tools from the book without (I know, a lot of my weirdness is there in the book) being too weird. So we started with a simple goal setting exercise moving on to some exercises that worked with the mind-body connection to boost confidence in the moment and while thinking about goals.

We also did some meditation and grounded the workshop with some crystal work. It was delightful to meet everyone.

If you’re Essex based (or near enough) and would like to find out more, I’m doing a couple of library workshops at Frinton on 16th October and a yoga and meditation workshop in Colchester on 30th September – click HERE for more information.

love,

Eve

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Talking about the importance of underwater handstands in Psychologies (September 2017)

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Delighted to be able to share the importance of underwater handstands for emotional wellbeing in Psychologies magazine. Thanks Lizzie Enfield :)

As in, it’s the FUN bit that’s important. Whatever that might mean for you.

What helps you connect with that inner playful child of yours?

How might you allow yourself to have more fun today?

Feel free to share below.

love,

Eve

 

 

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365 Ways to Feel Better featured in this month’s Top Sante and Spirit & Destiny

365 Ways to Feel Better has been featured in Spirit & Destiny (September 2017) and Top Sante (September 2017) – both out now.

The Spirit & Destiny piece includes some of my favourite yoga poses for sleep.

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The Top Sante piece includes some of my and others’ self-care tips.

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What is your favourite yoga pose for sleep?

love,

Eve

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