Category Archives: wellbeing at work

My last yoga classes in 2015

SigEvieRainbow

While I can’t believe it’s nearly 2016, it IS. So I thought I’d flag the remaining classes I’m teaching in case you’d like to bring some extra peace into your festive period by joining one of my small, friendly yoga classes.

Or maybe you’d like to book yourself in for the New Year.

 

Focusing on emotional health and wellbeing as well as strength, stamina and flexibility, they’re ideal for beginners (all levels welcome). You can find out more about my teaching style here.

I currently have two more spaces for my Yule classes on Monday 21st and Tuesday 21st December.

And I’ll be teaching on the Monday and Tuesday between Christmas and New Year – a great time to think about what you’re ready to release as well as what you want to invite into your lives and practices for 2016 and beyond.

You can view the current class schedule here.

Also, after more than a year teaching a weekly yoga class on Wednesdays at 5.30pm at DS Fitness, this Wednesday (23rd) will be my last (unless I cover).

Big thanks to Mark, David and the rest of the staff and all my students there – you’ll be in very good hands with Mina who’ll be taking over in the New Year. And if you want to take some much needed time for yourself before Christmas Eve, hope to see you there this Wednesday (this can be booked via Reception at DS Fitness).

Any questions, do let me know.

love,

Eve x

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Dealing with life’s ‘Grr!’s by looking at some sticky shadow stuff

Rainbow investigating HER shadow side*

Rainbow MagnifiCat investigating HER shadow side

 

I’m seeing a lot of posts on Facebook about people defriending others due to political beliefs. I’m aware that my rate of deleting posts I’ve typed before publishing them has increased massively since last night, too (and am conscious that a friend joked about a secret tool they have to read deleted posts!).

So I thought I’d spend some time with my shadow today. Jung popularised the idea of our shadow selves, where we project what we’ve disowned in ourselves onto others (be they loved ones, colleagues, strangers, politicians or people from other parts of the world and religions).

The bad news is that this leads to much acting out unconsciously.

The good news is that by reclaiming those unloved aspects of ourselves, WE CAN HEAL. We literally become more whole.

Thinking about this in the pool today, I realised that one of my personal triggers is people blocking the lane in the swimming (it’s a verb) pool. They could be standing to chat in a million other places, my incensed thought processes rant, and there are so few places to swim…

And on a good day, I can smile to myself recognising that this little Grr may have more to do with me than with the thoughtless people chattering away (ditto people blocking doorways, cycle paths, putting feet on train seats etc – I could go on but will restrain myself).

I can ask myself if there may be (even a teeny tiny) part of myself that may be jealous of their casual oblivious approach to life? That maybe I can acknowledge that swanning through life with less consideration for others could potentially be more fun. And as soon as I can acknowledge that, yes, of course, there’s a thoughtless, oblivious aspect of my own personality, I suddenly feel far less bothered by the previously seemingly Evil Lane Blockers.

Sometimes, like today, as soon as I have that epiphany, they move away!

I have a tendency to be overly empathic sometimes, focusing more on others’ needs than my own. This can be a useful thing (in my work, for example) but I’ve also worked hard to dial it back in my personal life as it’s not helpful (or fun!).

By being aware of this shadow aspect to caring and empathy (RAGE towards thoughtless people who don’t give a ****), I’m better able (progress not perfection) to own my own stuff and have a much nicer swim / bike ride / train journey / life etc.

If I remained oblivious to my own shadow, I might act out (swimming violently to SPLASH said Evil Lane Blockers (I’m joking, they’re totally normal people, just like you and me) or even saying, ‘Excuse me!’ in a slightly passive aggressive way.

You get the picture…

What springs to mind when you think about the people and situations that irritate / infuriate you the most?

Think about who makes you go ‘Grr!’ (if you want to – this is not for the fainthearted. Our shadow aspects are parts of ourselves that we, at some stage, unconsciously deemed So Awful, we cut them off, burying them in the dark).

Does a particular person (known personally or maybe on social media or on TV – anyone at all) really trigger you?

If you were Really Honest with yourself, what might your irritation or anger be trying to tell you about an unclaimed shadow aspect of yourself?

I’d love to hear your thoughts (if you’re happy to share) so do feel free to use the Comments section below and let me know what makes you go Grr and what that means to you?

And, of course, if you’d like to explore this in more depth, do get in touch.

love,

Eve x

 

 

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Inside Out – fab film and potential reminder around mindfulness of our emotions

InsideOut

I saw it last night and loved it.

And it’s another tool to help us notice when we’re being run by our emotions. The ever fantabulous Amy Poehler was especially terrifying as Joy when she was trying to hijack the other emotions, especially poor old Sadness (Phyllis Smith embodied her voice beautifully).

While they were the main characters (Joy suddenly finds herself not the main emotion in little Riley’s life after an unexpected move away from all her friends and hobbies), Disgust (Mindy Kaling – can’t wait for her new book to arrive), Fear and Anger were also essential.

Claudia Hammond wrote a gorgeous book some years back called Emotional Rollercoaster: A journey through the science of feelings. Inside Out made me want to dig it out and reread it.

This film felt (to me) like an emotional rollercoaster – I nearly made it through without crying although they’d been some near misses but, well, no. In my defense, I wasn’t the only one. And the tears felt good!

When you think of the Joy, Sadness, Fear, Anger and Disgust in your own head, which are you most aware of?

Which do you try to repress? (Remember poor old Sadness being instructed to stay in her teeny tiny circle?)

Has repressing your emotions ever worked?

It may seem silly now, considering the work I do, but when I first saw a counsellor in my early 20s, she asked me how I was feeling and although I was clearly being run by my emotions, I simply couldn’t tell her, or myself. Her simple ‘How does that feel?’ may as well have been in Russian (which I sadly cannot speak or understand).

Just checking in with yourself, a few times a day and wondering, which are you most conscious of, can help you better understand the language of your own feelings. There’s no need to try to change anything, simply give yourself permission to feel it.

This won’t, as Fear might have you believe, leave you completely hijacked by your Anger or Sadness. Instead, those feelings will pass more freely and easily leaving you less likely to act out on them.

You might also want to think about ways in which you can express your Joy more freely? What naturally sparks Joy for you?

What helps you deal with Sadness? How might you allow yourself to feel some of that pain, loss and grief and let it go more naturally? (A good cry at a fab film can help! I recommend this one).

What about Anger? We (especially women, in whom, even in 2015 it’s still less socially acceptable than in men) definitely don’t want to suppress this.

Look at how Anger at injustice has changed the world for the better when expressed lovingly by people like Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr, Mother Theresa, Nelson Mandela, Scilla Elworthy, Gloria Steinem, Eve Ensler – the list is endless.

What makes you angry? How can you channel that perfectly legitimate emotion into action you feel good about?

And, awww, Disgust. I failed to hold back a judgmental and disgusted, ‘Oh dear God’ as a small child spat (maybe he thought he was a professional footballer, whatever – eeeww) on the floor very near me yesterday. I’ve been known to turn this Disgust against myself for feeling it but, hopefully, with Mindy Kaling’s help (she embraced it fully), I’ll come to accept my own squeamishness more.

Are you easily disgusted? How might you express it in as healthy a way as possible?

Just noticing our usual default emotions in different situations can help us being to gain more freedom as we’re guided rather than hijacked by our feelings.

Good luck!

What might you choose to do differently to better express all of your emotions from today?

Feel free to answer below in the comments!

love,

Eve x

 

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Health and beauty fayre in Witham on Saturday – pop over to say ‘Hi!’

If you’re in Witham on Saturday 18th (between 10am and 4pm), do say ‘Hi!’

There’s a health and beauty fayre in the Newlands Centre so you’ll meet all sorts of  practitioners you may not have known worked locally.

I’ll be at the Feel Better Every Day gazebo, doing demos and chatting to people around some of the ways we can all use our minds, bodies, hearts and souls to Feel Better Every Day.

I’ll be answering any questions you might have about:

* counselling,

*coach-therapy,

* life coaching,

* NLP,

* yoga,

* yoga therapy for mental health,

*EFT,

* crystals,

* my work in organisations

and other services I offer from my base on Witham’s high street.

I’ll also be doing a yoga demonstration for DS Fitness (I teach a yoga class there every Wednesday at 5.30pm).

Hope to see you there.

love,

Eve x

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How easy do YOU find it to ‘Shake it off’ when something upsetting happens?

TaylorSwiftShakeItOff
Taylor Swift shakes it off

Resilience is something I’ve been working with for a long time and so I decided to create a separate page for it. You can click here to read more.

When have you felt most resilient?

When have you felt LEAST resilient?

What helped you most?

Feel free to comment below.

Metta, Eve x

 

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My column on making the most of downtime (published in Rapport, April 2015)

RapportDowntimeColumnApril15

I’m a little late with this one, but as the gales howl outside, it feels Aprilesque…

Click here to read the full column – RapportDowntimeColumnApril15

What times of the day, month and year do YOU feel most energised?

When do you feel most in need of downtime?

How can you support your natural body clock as much as your work will allow?

Feel free to comment below.

Metta, Eve x

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New class times for yoga and mindfulness in Witham, Essex

YogaClassesMay15

 

Based on feedback from some of my regular students and my own schedule, I’ve changed some of the class times.

You can find out more about my new class times here.

And if other times would work better for you, do let me know (by emailing me or posting in the comments below) and next time I review class times, I’ll keep them in mind.

Metta, Eve x

 

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Is insomnia affecting your weight and health? (My cover story in My Weekly, 28/4/15)

MW28April2015Sleep0024

MW28415Sleep

Oh, the irony, posting this when Rainbow MagnifiCat woke me up at2015-04-26 10.52.05 3.45am wanting to be fed today (she has dry food out the whole time). I normally feed her at 5am and go back to bed but this morning, between 3.45 and 5, she turned the light on a dozen times and I got the opportunity to play with several self-help tools for getting back to sleep (of course, I COULD have locked her out…) myself.

On the plus side, my nights of not great sleep are now (after early childhood to late 20s chronic insomnia – I nearly missed my Drama GCSE exam due to being up all night with anxiety and finally falling into a deep sleep) almost entirely behind me.

There are lots of things we can do to support ourselves. And getting to know our own insomnia triggers and quick fixes is essential as we’re all different.

Anyway, hope you find these tips helpful and if you’d like me to send you the Sleep Log I mention, just email me (eve@feelbettereveryday.co.uk) with My Weekly / Sleep Log in the subject header.

What helps you get a good night’s sleep?

Feel free to share your top tip as a comment below.

Metta,

Eve

x

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Which area/s of your life brings out your inner zombie?

Image courtesy of http://pixgood.com/cute-zombies-cartoon.html
Image courtesy of http://pixgood.com/cute-zombies-cartoon.html

I just spent a lovely couple of days on Michael Breen’s Behavioural Patterning training. Even though I qualified as an NLP Master Practitioner in 2008   have integrated much of it into my life (as well as into my client work), and have been on Rapport’s editorial team since 2007 (interviewing NLP leading lights and writing about its applications for each issue), NLP covers an enormous amount and there are areas that I know I’d like to delve more deeply into.

The Meta Model is amongst these areas so when I was offered a place on this training and could make it work with my schedule, I leaped at it.

While describing the TOTE (trigger, operate, test, exit) model, Michael said that George Ramiro wanted to make social commentary films in the ‘60s but couldn’t afford to so made zombie films. ‘Those zombies in the shopping mall in Dawn of the Dead? That’s us,’ he said.

Is there an area in your life where you feel stuck or in a bad habit or simply want to improve? Once we consciously think about what we want, identifying current behaviours and seeing we can change and changing (without years of therapy although, of course, therapy has its place), we can transform our lives.

Being on autopilot (be that overspending, overeating, losing things, not getting promoted, whatever it is you want to change) means we’re forgetting that we’re in charge of our thinking and what we do.

‘If you want to do things, learn how to do things. It’s all about moving the obstacles between what you’re currently doing and your desired state,’ says Michael. ‘By and large, people don’t challenge their own thinking.’

Where DO you want to go? If we don’t know, we’re like the zombies, just moving mindlessly.

Which area/s of your life brings out your inner zombie? Do feel free to comment below or email me.

And if you’d like to make a change (or many changes) and would like some support, get in touch.

Metta,

Eve

x

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